How Bullying Made me Successful
By: Matthew Gaynor
Those who have the biggest smiles are the ones who have shed the most tears; those who are the most caring have been broken the most; and finally, those who are the nicest have been tormented the most. All of these characteristics have one thing in common: They describe my past. I am a victim of bullying, and I do not think most people will understand, but I hope this post and my story will give you a new outlook on life and a story you will not forget.
For years, I have tried to understand why I was bullied. I use to want to piece everything about my history and knowledge into one. Now, I have finally accomplished that goal; here we go… how bullying made me successful.
Throughout my thirteen years in public school, I was always a kind individual who wanted the best for everyone. My childhood was not about making a lot of friends or being the social group leader; since I wanted to partake in activities that I saw as fun or interesting, even if that diverged from what was common at the time. While it is important to be your own unique person, many people, especially young children, are so fixated on how someone should act instead of accepting how others behave.
In short, my compassion and sense of heroism for others made me be an outcast to the people I went to school with. It still haunts me how these people, who I grew up with, would tease me for my stuttering and a slight speech impediment that I had in elementary and middle school; and that I would be called horrible names that made me question my self-worth. Imagine being called and seen as a fat loser for years upon years of your life; imagine being seen as undesirable for being a caring individual who loved to be as helpful as I could in class or my community. It is ironic to think that I used to assist my classmates while no one attempted to help me for years and years.
What is worse is how I bought into all the lies that these bullies said about me. This led me to become an annoying person since I never understood what a friend was or learned proper social skills until high school. The only friends I had before highschool were other outcasts by the main groups of people at my elementary and middle schools. Once these main friend groups were developed by the middle of elementary school, I was seen as someone who would try to be friends with these main groups of people just because I saw them as “cool” or because I wanted “attention.” This was never the case; in fact, my sad secret is how I never tried to be cool; I only did everything up to this point in my life because I wanted to be a hero to everyone. I wanted to be that knight in shining armor that would defend the innocent and fight for my friends; unfortunately, society does not work that way.
I could not just be some slump on the road who was waiting to finish public school and get through life; I was adamant about becoming positive, becoming a good guy. During my high school time, I found new people, deciding to give up on being friends with the kids who bullied me and treated me poorly. No human should put their lives up to the constant attacks of agitators who bother those who are gullible or kindhearted. With everything that I had experienced in my life, I knew it was time to be a true beacon for what I believed; I had to become successful. I began to focus on myself; I soon joined sports and clubs and did not care about what anyone said behind my back or what people thought of me. To be happy with my life, I needed results, and that was with excelling in school, extracurricular activities, and being accepted to colleges; so far, all three of these goals have been achieved.
I used to believe that the best way to get revenge on my bullies would be by force; while I could enact these negative thoughts, there would be no point. How could I call myself a hero if I want to harm others purposely? A few times, I told my bullies I knew that I would not hold back if they ever screwed with me again. Quick side note, I am a well-trained individual in martial arts, and since my Freshman year, I have been a fan of weight room training, so I have gotten quite strong. Back to the focus of my story, guess what my bullies would do once they saw me stand up for myself? They ran away from me like the little cowards they are. By Junior year, I finally understood that all my bullies were just jealous of me for how I got along exceptionally well with most adults I have met in my life. While my bullies mostly focused on making fun of people and acting like they control my school, I was busy focusing on school. In the end, kindness always shines brighter than hate because now, my bullies are worse off than me since they were too focused on bothering me in school than taking care of themselves. That kindness of mine would come back to help me because I finally made real friends in high school, and it is truly a wonderful gift to have them in my life.
I now have a future that does not include my bullies: I want to be a doctor, a job that I see the most that will let me be a true hero by saving lives and helping people who are in the most need of assistance. I have now gained an immense amount of self-confidence, and I know I am doing good in my life by actually helping my classmates and new friends with school or any problems they may face. My past with bullying shall never be forgotten, but I can no longer allow my nightmares to cover my future and current dreams that are in my reach. Ironically, I could not ask for a better life because I now have these experiences that have taught me imperative life lessons. Also, I would not have the amazing friends I have today without the bullying that I went through, as I would have never become as kind and caring as I now am. Another way to look at my situation is how I never let my bullies victimize me to take away my right gift, my heart of gold and compassion. As I always say, “there is always a blessing in every hand life gives you.”
Thank you for reading my story and history; I could have never gotten to this point without the people in my life that have helped me the most. As a senior, looking back at my past does not affect me as much as it used to; instead, I have a new goal: looking forward to the good that I will commit to in the future! Now that you know how bullying made me successful, I hope you will understand me just a little bit more. Like how I tell myself, try being nice to someone you are not close with; it may change their lives for the better. Until another day where you see me write, have a good one to my readers, take care!
don’t care didn’t ask